R.I.P B.B. KING

Besides playing great music, B.B. King supported worthy causes like this one.

Female Comic Strip Character Movie No. 6: JANE

Artist Pett, Leighton-Porter and Fritz

When I started this series of post over a year ago, I thought I would have to skip over a 1987 film based on the racy British WWII comic strip Jane. I could only find the trailer on Youtube and a news reel about the strip's artist, Norman Pett, promoting the comic strip.


The good news is I found both the first Jane film and the 1987 film. Now the bad news, I found both the first Jane film and the 1987 film.

Click to Enlarge and see Jane's panties

Click To Enlarge and see Jane's panties

First off, Jane (which debuted in 1932 in The Daily Mirror with the cumbersome title of  Jane's Journal or Diary of a Bright Young Thing)  was kind of a one note comic strip, with emphasis on strip. The reason for its popularity in England and its failure in the United States was due to the running gag of Jane losing her clothes or undressing. Jane's dress would get caught in the doors on a train, doors on an elevator, a nail or shrubbery and they would be torn off exposing Jane's brassiere and granny panties. Surprisingly, both films include this gag.

Jane loses her skirt in the 1949 film

In the 1949 film, entitled The Adventures of Jane, Jane is played by Chrystabel Leighton-Porter, the model who posed for Norman Pett.  By her own admission, she said she couldn't act and the movie was awful. Interestingly enough, the producers try to pass her off as the real Jane.

The best way to describe this film is dry and dull. An old man, who is a fan of Jane's burlesque act, gives her a bracelet. Her boyfriend, Tom, is a humorless dick, in more ways than one. He gets jealous then tells her it is fake. He then brings up that he is on the trail of a gang of jewel thieves.

You would think that would make an exciting film, but it doesn't. This is an hour of wasted film. There is an interesting effect for a car wreck near the end of the film. This movie makes everything tedious. There is a beauty contest (featuring 3 or 4 girl prettier than Chrystabel Leighton-Porter, but that is just me) which is boring. Most of the last portion of the film seems to be a long sequence of Fritz the dachshund running for help, accompanied by stock music that was in some of the Famous Studios cartoons.

Even though I am a fan of British films, I only recognized two of the actors in this film. Carry On regular Peter Butterworth plays a drunk, who is supposed to be comedy relief, but it is too forced.

Mr. French plays French guy

Then there is the Frenchman who nearly cries when a customs agent marks on his suitcase with chalk. I said to myself, "WAIT A MINUTE! THAT FRENCHMAN IS MR. FRENCH!" Yep! Sebastian Cabot, star of Family Affair, Checkmate and Ghost Story, has a small part. He and Butterworth are the biggest stars in this movie.

Jane And The Lost City is much more fun, but still not an award winning film by any degree. This film was made in 1987 during a time in which Jane was experiencing a nostalgia revival. In the early part of the 80s, the BBC ran a Jane TV series, in which the action took place inside comic strip box frame.

This movie was probably made to compete with the film Brenda Starr, which had already been announced but was not released until 1989. The film is played as a comedy, and unlike the 1949 version is very funny at times. This time Jane is played by the incredibly cute Kristen Hughes (above), who looks great in granny panties and nylons.

Jane, working with her boss, The Colonel, go to Africa to look for the giant diamonds of the Lost City, in hopes to get them before the Nazis' top agent, Lola Pagola (Maude Adams). After their plane crashes, Jane, The Colonel and his valet, Mr. Toombs, are rescued by Jungle Jack Buck, played by Sam J. Jones (Flash Gordon, The Spirit, Ted). Jungle Jack is an improvement over Tom the Dick, as Jones plays Jack as a smiling, would-be Indiana Jones.

One could make the complaint that this tries too hard to be funny. There is are Nazi triplets, all played by Jasper Carrott, who comes off as a poor man's Rowan Atkinson. The Lost City's Leopard Queen turns out to be a girl Jane knew from college. The film is also filled with references to films such Casablanca, Raiders of the Lost Ark, To Have and Have Not, The Mummy and Goliath and the Sins of Babylon. Jane loses her clothes more in this film, including a scene where a monkey tears them off.

Obviously, I recommend the 1987 film more. It is actually more enjoyable. Now let me leave you with a photo of both movie Janes together and fully clothed, during the making of the 1987 film.
     

"DO THE FREDDY" - FROM BRITISH INVASION DANCE CRAZE TO 80s HALLOWEEN SONG

Last week, I posted a list of my favorite British Invasion hits of the 60s. My sister, Villanova, who was in elementary school when the British Invasion started, ask why I left off Freddie and the Dreamers. My first thought was to say "Because they suck," then I thought I would be fair to the group and bring up a forgotten Halloween song of the past.

Freddie and the Dreamers had about five charted hit singles in America. Their biggest was the number one hit "I'm Telling You Now" in 1964. Their last record issued in this country was 1966, which made them a short lived phenomenon in the United States. Part of their problem was the novelty of their act. Other bands simply played songs and either made it by being cute and nice (The Beatles, Herman's Hermits, Dave Clark Five) or bad boys (The Animals, the Stones). Freddie and the Dreamers not only looked like nerds, but they hopped from leg to leg when they sang. Lead singer Freddie Garrity wave his arms like a skinny, bespectacled bird trying to take off for the clouds. Freddy also had a wacky, goofy laugh like a drunken witch that he worked into songs.

The group's second big hit was a 1965 dance number, based on the group's unusual stage movements, called "Do the Freddie." Here is video of them performing the song on TV in 1965.




Flash forward to Halloween of 1987. Some mad genius somewhere decides to create an LP to cash in on Hollywood's hottest monster, Freddy Krueger of the Nightmare on Elm Street movie series. The LP, entitled Freddy's Greatest Hits, featured a studio group, referred to on the cover of the LP as the Elm Street Group, recorded covers of several oldies ("In the Midnight Hour", "All I Have to Do is Dream") and some original songs inspired by the Nightmare on Elm Street films. On each track, Robert Englund, the actor who played Freddy Krueger, would growl or make some of Freddy's trademark bad puns or threats.

The song that was released as a single from this LP was "Do The Freddy." The spelling of the name was changed, but it was the same song. I might be wrong about this, but I don't believe the LP was ever issued on CD, because, at the time, CD's were new and this was a Halloween novelty LP aimed at kids. Here is the Elm Street Group version of "Do the Freddy."



This has to be one of the oddest covers of a hit song ever, but I'm sure child of the 80s played this at a Halloween party. Nothing like going from Freddie and the Dreamers to Freddy's nightmares. 

 

COLLEGE RADIO IPOD PLAYLIST

I loved college and have written about it on the old blog. When I entered college at Southwest Missouri State University, the buzz word in Billboard and Rolling Stone was "college radio was going to be the next big trend in radio." Eventually, the industry changed the name of it to alternative radio and made the stupid mistake of putting emphasis on country and talk radio, which about killed the industry by driving away the young listeners.

Let me take you back to my college days with the great music of that time (in no particular order). Some of these were around since junior high and elementary school, but they weren't considered cool until we were in college. Along the way, I may throw in some mainstays of the college party culture.

Unfortunately, I'm not sure what the college freshman are listening to this year. It may blow what we liked out of the water. I probably should check it out. I'm not one of those old curmudgeons who complain about modern music and believe young people are stupid.

"Like the Weather" - 10,000 Maniacs
"The One I Love" - REM
"Love Will Tear Us Apart" - Joy Division
"I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)" - The Proclaimers
"Talk To Ya Later" - The Tubes
"Pretty In Pink" - Psychedelic Furs
"Talk Talk" - Talk Talk
"25 O'clock" - The Dukes of the Stratosphere
"Just Like Heaven" - The Cure
"Loaded" - Primal Scream
"Eye of Fatima" - Camper Van Beethoven
"Musique Non Stop" - Kwaftwerk
"Cool Places" - Sparks with Jane Wielden
"Epic" - Faith No More
"I Melt With You" - Modern English
"Can Your Pussy Do The Dog?" - The Cramps
"Sheena Is a Punk Rocker" - The Ramones
"Victoria" - The Fall
"Tower of Strength" - The Mission
"Under the Milky Way" - The Church
"I Wanna Be Sedated" - The Ramones
"Hey Jealousy" - The Gin Blossoms
"Knock Me Down" - Red Hot Chili Peppers
"I Don't Like Mondays" - The Boomtown Rats
"A Girl In Trouble" - Romeo Void
"Love Buzz" - Nirvana
"Anarchy in the UK" - The Sex Pistols
"About a Girl" - Nirvana
"Eloise" - The Damned
"Ship of Fools" - World Party
"Indian Giver" - The Ramones
"That Is Why" - Jellyfish
"Balloon Man" - Robyn Hitchcock & the Egyptians
"Orange Crush" - REM
"Bela Lugosi's Dead" - Bauhaus
"World Shut You Mouth" - Julian Cope
"Greenback Dollar" - Washington Squares
"I Wanna Be Adored" - The Stone Roses
"Rock and Roll" - Velvet Underground
"1976" - Redd Kross
"Baby Baby" - The Vibrators
"I Want to Help You Ann" - The Lyres
"Goo Goo Muck" - The Cramps
"Hey St. Peter" - Flash & the Pan
"What's Inside a Girl" - The Cramps
"Buried Alive" - The Lyres
"Happy Hour" - The Housemartins
"Euro-Trash Girl" - Cracker
"All Come True" - World Party
"Strangelove"- Depeche Mode
"Blister In the Sun" - Violent Femmes
"I'm Not Your Stepping Stone" - The Sex Pistols
"So Alive" - Love & Rockets
"This Beat Goes On/Switching To Glide" - the Kings
"Gone Daddy Gone" - Violent Femmes
"Birdhouse in Your Soul" - They Might Be Giants
"Echo Beach" - Martha & the Muffins
"What Girls Want" - Material Issue
"Private Idaho" - The B-52s
"Personal Jesus" - Depeche Mode
"No Rain" - Blind Melon
"Someday Someway" - Marshal Crenshaw
"What I Am" - Edie Brickle & the New Bohemians
"Rough Night In Jericho" - Dreams So Real
"Girl of My Dreams" - Bram Tchaikovsky
"No Fun" - The Stooges
"Charlotte's Remains" - The Fuzztones
"The Good Life" - Fire Town
"Cuts You Up" - Peter Murphy
"Blood & Roses" - The Smithereens
"Ashes To Ashes" - David Bowie
"Istanbul (Not Constadinople)" - They Might Be Giants
"It's the End of the World (As We Known It)" - REM
"TV Eye" - The Stooges
"Behind the Wall of Sleep" - The Smithereens
"Walk On By" - The Stranglers
"Step On You" - The Happy Mondays
"I Can't Stand It Anymore" - Velvet Underground
"Mayor of Simpleton" - XTC
"Smells Like Teen Spirit" - Nivana
"Low" - Cracker
"Hazy Shade of Winter" - The Bangles

And for the Animal House fans:

"Fight For You Right" - The Beatsie Boys
"Funky Cold Medina" - Tone Loc
"Bust a Move" - Young MC
"Me So Horny" - 2 Live Crew
"Mony Mony" Billy Idol
 "What I Like About You" - The Romantics
"Shout" - Isley Brothers
"Louie Louie" - The Kingsmen

  

SECRET LOVE - MOST ANNOYING RECORD COMMERCIAL EVER

As a child, I always liked commercials for records. They usually featured bombastic announcers rattling off the names of the songs on the records, a Chyron graphic vertical scroll of the titles of the songs on the record, usually accompanied by photos of the artist or some related photos (i.e. boys and girls dancing at prom or bikers cruising down Route 66. One even featured a NASA rocket launch). Most of these records were offered by a company called Sessions (although they were produced by major companies such as Warner Brothers, RCA or Columbia).

It was around my senior year in high school (Maybe my first year of college - this commercial ran forever) that I saw what I thought was the worst record commercial ever featuring what, at the time, I considered some of the worst songs in the world. The commercial was for a 4 LP, 3 cassette collection called Secret Love. I might be wrong, but I think this is the first TV record ad to offer a compact disc version. I hated this commercial.

First off, it probably aired more than any record commercial in history. It seemed like it was on every commercial break.

Second, this record was loaded with songs I hated. In the commercial there were only two songs that I liked, "Nights In White Satin" by the Moody Blues and "Waiting For a Girl Like You" by Foreigner. However, seeing the complete track listings there were a few others I like ("Dream Weaver" by Gary Wright and "Strange Way" by Firefall). These were those wimpy songs that radio stations here in the Ozarks were beating to death. These were also the songs favored by the snooty popular girls, who wouldn't go out with me. They were also on student council, so they picked the music for the school dances. it was usually this stuff.

Third, had to do with the format of this ad. Unlike the previous records ads that I mentioned above, this ad must have been the first to feature on-screen spokes people or characters. This one featured an ANNOYING PREPPY COUPLE IN CABLE-KNIT SWEATERS SITTING BY A FIREPLACE IN AN UPSCALE HOME.  I could not stand those two people! They were the little goody-goody, overachiever types that were the bane of my existence in high school (I still run in to a few of these people through work). I would see this commercial and ask myself, "What does that beautiful girl see in that preppy dork???" Notice: The clothes are the same as on the record cover above, but different model/actors.



At the time this aired, I was into mainly heavy metal (hair bands), college rock (alternative and punk to young folks) and classic rock/oldies. I thought it would be great if they made a set of the music I liked. There wasn't a metal or college rock set, but there was a classic rock/oldies set with great songs on it entitled Freedom Rock. Unfortunately, the commercial featured two idiots dressed as hippies sitting by a VW Micro-bus doing a bad Cheech & Chong imitation.

While I still dislike preppies, I have come to accept and even enjoy old soft/light rock of the 70s and 80s. As a matter of fact, readers of this blog may remember that I have proposed a revamped version of the soft/light AC/rock radio format that removes the "Little Miss Pris-Delilah-Mommy Blogger" attitude that made these radio station unbearable to listen to since the early 90s. The music and romantic or mellow mood would be the focus, instead of discussions about "soda-being-bad-for-you" or "girls-wear-too-sexy-dresses-to-prom." As Gilligan at Retrospace would say, it would be "Music for making pancakes."

Maybe in some crazy way, the Secret Love commercial spawned that idea, because "This music brings out the animal in people."   

      

A TOUCH OF GREY KIND OF SUITS YOU ANYWAY

The LHS Class of 1987 had trouble making an 8.

I recently attended my 25th year class reunion. Yeah, I'm surprised they invited me too. I wasn't exactly the most well liked person at Lebanon High School. 1987?!?! What can be said about 1987? As many of you who read this know, I'm not a "my-generation-is-better-than-your-generation" type of person. To be quite honest there was many things on TV, movies and in music back in 1987 that SUCKED BIG TIME!

I was looking at the various radio survey charts on ARSA, I began to notice that there were some of the music between September of 1986 and June of 1987 was really wimpy. Radio airwaves were ruled by Whitney Houston.  I think this may explain why I became interested in classic rock and college rock (later to be known as alternative). It also was one of the reasons I wanted to get into radio. I felt I needed to be a program director to change the kind of music that was getting on the air. Of course, I also would listen to Woody P. Snow on KXUS and Dr. Don Carpenter on Rock 99 (KWTO-FM) on my way to school. I began thinking, "This would be a perfect job for me. I could be a wild and outrageous morning show host." Sadly, the consolidation of ownership in radio has lead to the demise of both of these jobs in many areas. During that time, you could tape your favorite song off radio. There seemed to be quite a few good Top 40 stations in the area. I just didn't appreciate it at the time. During the 90s, there was about one real Top 40/CHR station in the area. I will have to say things are swinging back to the way they were in the 80s. Now would be a good time for kids in the Ozarks to tape their favorite songs off of the radio, if they still do that.

I knew I wanted to be involved in the media. I decided as another option to radio I thought a great job would be program director at an independent TV station. Back in the 80s, independent TV stations were fun because they had to fill there time with what ever they could. Usually, old movies, old TV shows and old cartoons. Three things happened that changed that: 1) upstart networks like Fox and CW (originally the WB),  2) Specialty cable networks like TV Land, Turner Classic Movies, AMC, and Boomerang, 3) infomercials or pre-paid programs. Many independent TV stations became Fox or  CW affiliates, which took up the evening hours with their programing. As the cable networks became popular, many independent TV stations got it through their heads that since many older shows and movies were on cable, why duplicate their programing. The alternative (at least in this area) is run infomercials and prepaid package shows that are usually bad "judge" programs or bad "infotainment" shows.

I went to college to get a degree in media. During that time, I would attend seminars in K.C with a group called International Association of Business Communicators. I was told by these K.C and St. Louis business people that a media would be the ticket in the door to a high paying job in any field, not just media. Not only did businesses in Springfield, Lebanon and the surrounding are not get the memo on that, they seem to be against hiring anyone with a authentic college education. They seem to either want someone with an MBA from some fly-by-night school that holds classes in a bank after hours or no post-high school education. 

David Rasche as Sledge Hammer "Trust Me, I know what I'm doing." 

One of my favorite TV shows during my senior years was a satirical sitcom called Sledge Hammer! (Yes, there was an exclamation point at the end of the title). I think this may have gave birth to my love of broad satire. For those who never saw the show (It was one of the lowest rated shows during its two year run), Sledge Hammer! was to Dirty Harry and Hunter, what Get Smart was to James Bond and the Man from U.N.C.L.E.   The main character, Sledge Hammer (played by Missouri born actor David Rasche), was an overly enthusiastic plain-clothes, police detective, who talked to his 44 Magnum. Sledge liked to use excessive violence, such as firing a warning shot a jaywalker, using a bazooka to stop a sniper on the roof of a building and target practicing with his 44 Magnum in his apartment. He also spouted outrageous lines that were a satirical poke at macho, conservative types in 1987. The bad part is when you watch the episodes now, you notice that the stuff Sledge says isn't as stupid as the things being said by most talk radio show host or congressional Republicans (especially the ones from Missouri). As a matter of fact, watching another 80s sitcom, Family Ties, I notice that the then popular neo-con sitcom character Alex P. Keaton is seems like an antiquated character. Sadly, Alex is a fantasy, while Sledge has become a reality. Yipes!

Babe bashing not allowed in 1987.

One of my other obsessions at that time was girls. One reason I wanted to be in the media was in hopes of scoring the ultimate babe. I thought the women would be crawling all over me because I was either on radio or TV. I could see myself dating a supermodel, bikini model or female newscaster. Never happened sadly. Let me point out here something that has changed for the worst, men's opinions of famous women. I have seen horrible things posted about famous women on Yahoo, MSN, Facebook and You Tube about Katy Perry, Paris Hilton, Holly Madison, or Kim Kardashian. We didn't have these websites in the 80s, but if any guy had said some of these things about Cindy Crawford, Cindy Brinkley, Brooke Shields, Elle McPherson, Kim Bassinger or Kathy Ireland people would have wondered about their sanity, libido or manners. It seems to be these comments are made by redneck who pose for their profile photo in front of a Confederate flag or by people who use a photo of John Wayne or Ronald Reagan for their profile photo. It seems to make these little wanna-be men feel macho, but it just shows how low on the evolutionary chart they are. I guess sex was more important in the good ole days of 1987. 
  
I started working on this post about three weeks ago, I realize that I've taken most of the changes in stride. I don't get bent out of shape about everything younger people do. As a matter of fact, most of my best friends are younger than me. I also don't feel a need to be superior to them. I think I have younger friends because I really haven't changed since I was in high school. I have the same ultra-laid back attitude about things. A case in point would be a discussion I had with an older co-worker about a LHS Class of 87 member who allegedly defrauded a Lebanon boat manufacture of a large sum of money. This co-worker was shocked when I said, "So what. Its a big corporation. They make plenty of money. They won't miss it and will get over it." My co-worker seems to be part of that "Standing up for what's right" school of radio philosophy, where as I share the philosophy of the late Bill Drake, "The hits just keep a-coming!" Of course, this co-worker also thinks an auctioneer should host a radio show.

I think the song from that year that for me sums up my thoughts on graduating from LHS 1987  would be the song that I first heard on the radio as I left the run through for the graduation ceremony. It was by "Touch of Grey" by the Grateful Dead. It would become their only Top 40 and Top 10 hit. "We will get by. We will survive."

Of course, opinions, like the ones expressed here, explains why I'm considered the Super Villain of the Ozarks!!! Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!