Wednesday, July 27, 2011


It may be hard to believe, but even in the late 70s and early 80s, there were things that were considered taboo on commercial TV. Many taboos were broken by All In the Family and Saturday Night Live. Flatulence was not a subject dealt with on TV in those days.

What broke that taboo could be considered the first "viral" video or "meme." On the Tonight Show, Johnny Carson liked to show Cleo Award winner from all over the world. One got a big response. It was for Shiseido Olive Bath Soap. It featured several small naked boys bathing together, accompanied by military marching music. The commercial ends with one of the boys passing gas in the bath water and the other boys moving way from him.

It was shown several times during the mid 70s on the Tonight Show. Then in the early 80s, it was shown in prime time on both a Tonight Show anniversary special and a Steve Martin TV special. Then it was shown on a commercial retrospective TV special hosted by Ed McMahon. For a brief period in the late 70s and early 80s, this Japanese soap commercial was everywhere you turned on TV. Then it was gone. Surprisingly it was hard too find on You Tube until now.

Saturday, July 23, 2011


Like many guys my age, I became enthralled with the adventures of Doc Savage, through the paperback reprints of the 60s, 70s and 80s. I was delighted a few years back to find that these thrilling stories were written by a man from La Plata, Missouri named Lester Dent. He used the pen name of Kenneth Robeson. The super strong, gadgeteer Doc Savage and his five assistants paved the way for such heroes as Indiana Jones, James Bond, Superman, Batman, the Fantastic Four and Johnny Quest.

So why does the state of Missouri rarely acknowledge Lester Dent and Doc Savage? Why do they spend money time and money promoting about Laura Ingles Wilder, who was born in Wisconsin?

I have found very few articles about Lester Dent and Doc Savage in the state’s media. Two good ones I found online are from Rural Missourian and one from an unknown source on the Truman University - Pickler Memorial Library website. However, you can find numerous articles from local newspapers and magazines about Laura Ingles Wilder’s connection to Missouri.

I will admit up-front, I despise the works of Laura Ingles Wilder. Especially the TV show Little House on the Prairie. This goes back to my horrible, tortured childhood in Lebanon, Missouri. I was often told by the adults in the community that I should watch Little House on the Prairie (and the Waltons) because it was “better for me” than the shows I liked.

That could be one of the reasons that Wilder’s Little House franchise is promoted by the state of Missouri over Dent’ Doc Savage. Wilder’s world is seen as good, old-fashion, wholesome entertainment, whereas Dent’s world is filled with modernism, science fiction/horror, and excitement, which is frowned upon by many in Missouri (especially in the Ozarks). Although, it should be noted that Dent always maintained that Doc Savage had “Christlike” qualities.

The Little House books talk about the world so many in the Missouri want to embrace. They want to keep Missouri a world of one room schoolhouses, church dinners and barn raisings. Even in the Great Depression, Doc Savage had television, jet planes and a telephone answering machine. Doc Savage had at his disposal the things we take for granted.

Part of the reason Doc Savage isn’t mentioned as much is Doc Savage has only been successful in the publishing world of paperback novels, comic books and magazines. He had a short lived radio show in the 30s and one on NPR in the 80s. He also had one movie, Doc Savage - Man of Bronze, in 1975. It stared TV Tarzan Ron Ely and Paul Gleason (later in the Breakfast Club). I seem to be the only person who liked this movie. There wasn’t a sequel.

Of course, Little House on the Prairie ran from the mid 70s through the 80s on NBC. Every week the Ingles family suffered one hard ship after another. That long running TV series, whether I like it or not, gives Wilder more publicity worldwide than Dent and Doc Savage has gotten.

Finally, the state of Missouri may prefer Wilder because her stories frequently took place in Missouri, where Dent sent Doc Savage and his five pals off on adventures around the world. Doc Savage also lived in a penthouse in New York.
Needless to say, I would still like to see Lester Dent and Doc Savage recognized more by the state of Missouri. The state of Missouri should be ashamed for ignoring Lester Dent’s contribution to the literary world and pop culture. Maybe some of our state officials should stop trying to block the President’s health care reform and give Lester Dent and Doc Savage their due.

Of course, opinions, like this one, explains why I’m called the Super Villain of the Ozarks!!! Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Tuesday, July 19, 2011


I hate when some doofus jumps my songs on the juke box at Buffalo Wild Wings. I especially hate when they jump my great classic rock/punk/funk picks for current country. The current state of country music is so bad. Most of the songs have a cut and paste quality to them.

What am I talking about? Most current country songs follow a pattern in the lyrics. When I worked in country music radio in the 90s, the songs each sounded different. The current country song crop all have lyrics that sound alike.

I have come up with a cut and paste method for writing a current country song.

First, you start off saying that you grew up on a dirt road.
Second, you mention your grandparents.
Third, mention going to church.
Forth, talk about drinking beer.
Fifth, mention listening to Hank Jr., Johnny Cash, Jimmy Buffett or Lynard Skynard or all of them.
Sixth, mention the mail box at the end of the dirt road you grew up on.
Seventh, mention blue jeans or cutoff jeans being worn by a girl.
Eighth, slam New York or Hollywood or both.
Ninth, compare your love for a woman to Johnny Cash and June Carter.
Tenth, mention that you salute the veterans and troop serving in the military.
Eleventh, mention drinking beer again.
Twelfth, mention listening to Hank Jr., Johnny Cash, Jimmy Buffett, or Lynard Skynard or all of them.
Thirteenth, mention driving your pickup down a dirt road.
Fourteenth, mention drinking beer again.
Fifteenth, mention going to church again.
Sixteenth, mention listening to Hank Jr, Johnny Cash, Jimmy Buffett, or Lynard Skynard or all of them again.
Seventh, mention the troops and church or both again.

There you go. You now have a current hit country song.

Monday, July 18, 2011


One of the early post on this new blog was about a 70's hits compilation I bought at the Heartland Antique Mall in Lebanon, MO. It was called Cutting Loose and featured a photo of a sexy girl in denim cutoffs painting a rainbow down the center of a highway. I also noticed that she had a "stain" on the seat of her shorts. I thought it was possible water damage to my cover, until I saw photos of it on other websites. It was on that photo too.
I made jokes to the effect that the girl had an "accident."
Last week, I began receiving several hits on this post from a progressive rock forum called Progressive Ears. There was a post from a forum member saying their brother had the LP when he was a kid. Another forum member posted a link to the post on my blog. Some commented on my evaluation of the cover and my questions about the model being incontinent. One person said the post was "tasteless" and one said I needed to get a life (How many times have I heard that?).
They also posted a link to another website with a photo of the LP with a credit to a website called Bizarre Records. I looked at this website until I found a post about it. The post on that website is entitled "Technicolor Pee."
Glad to know I'm not crazy.

Friday, July 15, 2011

BAD FASHION OF THE PAST: Maize/Gold Men's Dress Shirts

There is one fashion trend of the past that I hope doesn't return. Nothing major, just a color of mens shirts.  I feel it was something that just snuck in and had the staying power to become a major part of my childhood.  It is a sometimes referred to as "maize" or "gold." They were at their peek of popularity from 1967 - 1976. They were a staple of most men's wardrobes, usually worn with a brown double-knit suit. My father had one of these shirts, my uncles had them, the men at church had them and KYTV's Bill Williams, Fred Miller and Ned Reynolds wore them under there KY3 blazers.

This was not just an Ozarks thing. You could find these on the newsmen on all three of the major networks. You saw them on the middle-age husband nervously laughing in the Smothers Brothers audience. You saw them on men in the audience of Ed Sullivan, Johnny Cash, Tom Jones and Carol Burnett. They were worn by old men dancing with their wives on the Lawrence Welk Show. They were worn by Karen & Richard Carpenter's Sunday school teacher on This Is You Life. They were worn by Buck Owens on Hee Haw and Bill Gaither on a Sunday morning religious program. They were worn by both Johnny Carson and Ed McMahon on the Tonight Show and Flip Wilson wore them on his show. They were worn by Mike Brady in his pre-permed hair days. They were worn by everyone on My Three Sons except Uncle Charley. They were worn by Mannix under his plad jackets. They were worn by that chain-smoking, Humphrey Bogart-dopalganger, lawyer on Dark Shadows (Can't remember that character's name-it is the same actor played the witch hunter Reverend Trask in the 1700-1800 story lines). They were worn by male contestants on Match Game, the Price is Right and other game shows of the day. They were worn by crooks on Ironside and The Mod Squad.

It was international too. Both Stuart Sullivan and Jason King on Department S wore maize-gold shits them, as did the poor, unfortunate London residents attacked by aliens on Doctor Who wore the maize-gold shirt. This trend even defied the Iron Curtain as evidenced by the famous You Tube clip of Russian crooner Edward Khil, the Trololo Guy. I mentioned many TV reference for one simple reason. It was through these old TV shows, especially the video tapped programs, and old photographs that we can see that THESE SHIRTS ARE BUTT UGLY!!!

Photographs, film and video have not been kind to the memory of this Vietnam era fashion statement of the Silent Generation. Thanks to DVD and various cable outlets showing these various programs, we can see this. The color can best be described as an old expired jar of mustard or the bowel movement of seven month old baby. Granted, this color did not look as bad as house paint or on household appliances, but it is rather jarring in the clothing world. Part of the problem could be it is a garish pastel yet it is drab and dull. As I mentioned they seem to look even worse in photographs and on video. They make the person wearing it (usually a balding man in horn-rimmed eyeglasses) stick out like a sore thumb. They could be standing next to an early 70s TV babe like Karen Valentine, Peggy Lipton or Maureen McCormick, yet the first thing you think when you see the photo is, "Where did that guy get that ugly shirt?"

Sometime in the mid-70s, this color left the fashion world to stay in the real of house paint, appliance colors and school buses. Maybe men began to see what these shirts looked like on them, especially when they were stupid enough to wear them with a green sport coat. The maize-gold shirt makes the wearer look hopelessly nerdy. Here is hope that the maize-gold shirt never comes back in style.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011


I thought it would be fun to list the solo artist, who first got our attention as a member of a group that their solo career later eclipsed. I left off a few obvious ones because we knew the group well enough that we followed them on to a solo career, i.e: All four Beatles, Michael Jackson, Lionel Ritchie, Phil Collins, Ozzy Osbourne, Diana Ross and Kenny Rogers. The groups I mention either had very minor “bubbling under” or regional hits, one hit or two or three minor hits. In some case another person’s name was on the band, but a major star was in the band or group somewhere. Also many of these were years before the artist made it big

Al Kooper - The Royal Teens/Blues Project/Blood Sweat & Tears
Wilson Pickett/Eddie Floyd - The Falcons
Bert Convey (game show host) - The Cheers
Patti LaBelle/Nona Hendryx - The Blue-Belles
Jake Holmes/Joan Rivers - Jim, Jake & Joan
Carly Simon - The Simon Sisters
Alan Arkin (actor) - The Tarriers
Tommy Chong- Bobby Taylor & the Vancouvers
John Phillips/Scott McKenzie - The Journeymen
Michael Martin Murphy/Boomer Castleman - The Lewis & Clarke Expedition
John Denver - The Mitchell Trio
Linda Ronstadt - The Stone Poneys
Billy Joel - The Hassles
Debbie Harry - The Wind & Willows
Rick Derringer - The McCoys
Nick Gilder/Bryan Adams - Sweeny Todd
Duane & Greg Allman - The Hourglass
Joe Stampley - The Uniques
Delbert McClinton - The Ron-Dels
Ted Templeman (producer) - Harper’s Bizarre
Eddy Grant - The Equals
Marc Bolan (T.Rex) - John's Children
Gary Busey(actor) - Carp
Todd Rundgren - The Nazz/Runt
Dusty Springfield - The Springfields
Keith Emerson - The Nice
Rod Stewart - The Moontrekers/Jeff Beck Group
Peter Frampton - The Herd
Boz Scaggs - The Steve Miller Band
Don Williams - The Pozo Seco Singers
Chuck Woolery(game show host) - The Avant-Garde
Ted Nugent - The Amboy Dukes
Teddy Pendergrass - Harold Melvin & the Blue Notes
Billy Squire - Piper
Paul Carrack - Ace
Vince Gill - Pure Prairie League
Bobby Brown - New Edition
David Lindley - Kaleidoscope
Don Glut (filmmaker/film historian/author) - Penny Arkade
Taj Mahal/Ry Cooder - The Rising Sons
Rupert Holmes - the Street People
Chevy Chase (actor) - The Chameleon  Church
Billy Idol - Generation X
John Beck (actor) - The Leaves
Nick Lowe - Kippington Lodge
Dave Edmunds - The Love Sculpture
David Bowie - David Jones & the Lower Third/The Manish Boys
Warren Zevon - Lyme & Cybelle
Albert Hammond - The Magic Lanterns

I put the Magic Lanterns last to clear up one of the great misconceptions of rock and roll. Albert Hammond, who wrote the Hollies classic “The Air That I Breath” and had a hit with the song “It Never Rains In Southern California,” joined the group after they had a hit with a song called “Shame Shame.” However, many people have been under the mistaken impression that the bass player, Mike “Oz” Osbourne is Ozzy Osbourne. Some record stores and dealers have sold the Magic Lanters LPs for high prices, claiming it is early material from Ozzy Osbourne. Don’t be fooled!

Friday, July 1, 2011


Once again I stole an idea from KY-3's Ethan Forhetz. One the KYTV website this week Ethan picked his 10 favorite summer songs. Like last time, I couldn't stop at only ten, I went to sixty again.

  1. Walking On Sunshine    Katrina & The Waves
  2. Summer In The City    The Lovin' Spoonful
  3. Good Vibrations    The Beach Boys
  4. The First Day Of Summer    Tony Carey
  5. Summertime        Billy Stewart
  6. Soak Up The Sun    Sheryl Crow
  7. Magic        The Cars
  8. Hot Fun In The Summertime    Sly & The Family Stone
  9. Summertime Blues - Eddie Cochran/Blue Cheer/The Who
  10. Saturday In The Park        Chicago
  11. Summer Rain       Johnny River
  12. Summer Breeze      Seals & Crofts
  13. Cheap Sunglasses    ZZ Top
  14. Hot In The City    Billy Idol
  15. Cruel Summer    Bananarama
  16. Heat of the Moment   Asia
  17. School's Out        Alice Cooper
  18. Pleasant Valley Sunday    The Monkees
  19. Beach Baby    First Class
  20. California Gurls (feat. Snoop Dogg)    Katy Perry
  21. Kokomo          The Beach Boys
  22. Light My Fire       The Doors
  23. Twisting By The Pool      Dire Straits
  24. Vacation    The Go-Go's
  25. Heat Wave    Linda Ronstadt
  26. Echo Beach    Martha & The Muffins
  27. Paper Sun    Traffic
  28. Rio    Duran Duran
  29. Boy On a Roof   The Outnumbered
  30. Goin' Crazy!    David Lee Roth
  31. Short Shorts      The Royal Teens
  32. Sausalito Summernight    Diesel
  33. Summertime, Summertime    The Jamies
  34. Turn Down Day    The Cyrkle
  35. Under The Boardwalk    The Drifters
  36. September   Earth, Wind and Fire
  37. I Got A Line On You          Spirit
  38. The Theme From "A Summer Place"    The Percy Faith Orchestra
  39. Summertime Girls    Y&T
  40. Bummer In The Summer    Love
  41. Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie Yellow Polka Dot Bikini    Brian Hyland
  42. A Summer Song    Chad & Jeremy
  43. Come On Down To My Boat       Every Mother's Son
  44. Beautiful Girls    Van Halen
  45. Holidays In The Sun     Sex Pistols
  46. Black Water    The Doobie Brothers
  47. Fun, Fun, Fun       The Beach Boys
  48. Gimme Little Sign    Brenton Wood
  49. Here Comes Summer      The Dave Clark Five
  50. Cool Change   Little River Band
  51. Rockaway Beach    The Ramones
  52. Grazing In The Grass        The Friends Of Distinction
  53. Sunshine Of Your Love    Cream
  54. Moonlight Feels Right    Starbuck
  55. We're An American Band    Grand Funk Railroad
  56. Born To Run    Bruce Springsteen
  57. Hello, I Love You            The Doors
  58. Long Hot Summer    The Style Council
  59. All Day Music          War
  60. Summer Holiday    Cliff Richard
  61. One Summer Night    The Danleers

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