Tuesday, January 31, 2012

LOOKING BACK ON FIVE YEARS OF BLOGGING

As many of you know, I have decided not to continue updating the original blog, Desdinova the Super Villain of the Ozarks, because it is too much trouble to work on two blogs at once. Also I deleted some of the post because they were either irrelevant, outdated or contained broken links to articles that are no longer available. I also deleted some that could keep me from further employment in the local media.


When I started this blog, I was one of the most hated people on the Internet in the Ozarks. It started off with my comments on the Missouri Radio Message Board and Ron Davis' Chatter blog. I decided to create a "voice" for my persona. I based it part on the character of Ronnie the Z-Man from Beyond the Valley of the Dolls (top) and Stewie from Family Guy (bottom). I used the name Desdinova the Eternal Light at first.

My legend began after several skirmishes with someone calling himself Talk Radio Guy. I also believe this person was making anonymous comments on Chatter blog. This Talk Radio Guy would get mad when I made jokes about a local talk radio show host.

I had been considering setting up my own blog, but I decided to go ahead with it after I made a comment on Ron's blog about a photo of this talk radio show host that was in the News Leader. I'll admit the comment was rather mean and nasty, but I will go to my grave feeling absolutely no remorse for posting that, because this talk radio show host (as well as some of the scummy ones I've been forced to work with) was known for saying rather heartless things about people. He supposedly cried on the air about this. The bad part some of my co-workers (They didn't know it was me) were angry that someone would do such a thing. Many people were for some reason upset with Ron over this. I think some thought that Ron was Desdinova also. They also thought I was a rival talk show host (He isn't as funny as me).


So I created a blog of my own where I created a persona of a hip, liberal, megalomaniacal, mad scientist. A scary but fun person much like British rocker/political activist Screaming Lord Sutch (above).

I was going to delete all of the earlier post until I reread the post that people hated the most and realized that not only are they great satirical humor, but anyone who was offended by this stuff would have to be STUPID.


The infamous face of Desdinova was something I originally designed for a character based on the Italian super-criminal-hero Diabolik (above). It is a altered photo from a site that sells bondage clothes. The model doesn't realize he is the face of most hated blogger in the Ozarks.

The "voice" of Desdinova was a mix of famous movie actors, who played villains, as well as cartoon villains. Apparently, the talk radio crowd here in the Ozarks didn't grown up watching Saturday morning cartoons, old movie serials or horror films like I did, or they would have realized that I wasn't a mad scientist with a giant robot and zombie soldiers that lived under Park Central Square. I was told by a friend who works at Springfield Police Department that there were people calling them asking why "they hadn't arrested Desdinova yet."

I would like to pay tribute to those who I channeled while writing my post on the old blog. The first two inspired my "evil" laugh (Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!)
 
Count Von Count from Sesame Street
 
Krankor from Prince of Space




Boris Karloff as Fu Manchu
Claude Rains as the Invisible Man
Christopher Lee as Fu Manchu
Dr. No
Dr. Evil from Austin Powers
The Crimson Ghost
Alex from Clockwork Orange
Freddy Kruger




Lex Luthor from Superman

Simon Bar Sinister from Underdog

Vincent Price
Coffin Joe

Victor Buono

Peter Cook as Lucifer/Mr. Spiggot in Bedazzled
Blofeld from James Bond



Darth Vader

Dr. Strangelove

Dr. Smith from Lost In Space
Skeletor from He-Man

Dr. Meirshultz from Maniac
Some people ask, "Shouldn't you apologize to some people. I still maintain that most of my targets deserved it. There is only one person deserving an apology.  Her name is Melinda and I used a school photo she gave me in 9th grade to illustrate some of my post. I have since switched the photo with a photo of a pretty girl from a 50's yearbook I found on-line. There is only one photo of Melinda left on the blog, because the post wouldn't make sense with the other photo (Someone on a message board linked to the photo thinking it was childhood photo of Paris Hilton-there is a slight resemblance). That post also mentions people thinking I was "the rival talk radio show host" of that "talk radio show host" I poked fun at. That could get me a visit from the FBI. 

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Robert Hegyes, Epstein of ‘Welcome Back Kotter’ Fame, Dead at 60

Robert Hegyes, Epstein of ‘Welcome Back Kotter’ Fame, Dead at 60: Robert “Bobby” Hegyes, best known for playing Juan Epstein on “Welcome Back Kotter,” died in his Metuchen, N.J. home today. He was 60. Courtesy of ABC News. I always thought that it would fun to go to school with the Sweathogs. Unfortunately, I went to school with rednecks and Republican kids that hated me. "Dear Mr. Kotter: Please excuse, my son, Juan. He has passed away."

Saturday, January 14, 2012

WHAT HAPPENED TO POKING FUN AT SQUARES?



Over time the portrayals of certain groups of people have changed over the years. You can see many horrible politically incorrect images in old movies and cartoons. I feel that our nation is better off because we now frown on this type entertainment, yet I feel have no problem with TCM or DVD's showing this in the historical context.

However, I have noticed an odd paradigm shift of sorts that I do not think is healthy for our pop culture. It is also hard to understand.  When I was growing up, there were "nerds" and there were "squares." Yes, we poked fun at nerds in their horn-rimmed glasses with the tape on them, high-water pants, two-toned shoes and walrus laugh. They were clumsy around girls and were not very hip, but they were harmless. If given a chance, they could hang with the really cool people and be quite a bit of fun. They long to be cool too.  Truth is: WE ALL ALL NERDS IN SOMEWAY. To give you an example, Eddie Deezen (above) is the perfect example of a nerd. Other examples would be the late Wally Cox and Thom Bray of Riptide.


On the other hand, there were the "squares." These people are never any fun. They never smile. They have an axe to grind with the modern society. Unlike the nerd, who longs to be cool, the square does want to be cool. They feel that feel that it is wrong to be cool. They also work to destroy anything that is fun or cool. Squares like to get on a soapbox and give a big speech about how much better they are than you. Of course, us hipsters would blow a raspberry, thumb our nose or make a sarcastic comment about them. It was actually more acceptable to make fun of a "square" than a "nerd," because, as I mentioned earlier, most people feel that they themselves are nerds, yet a square is pompous, arrogant and put themselves above everyone else. The squares typically were in authority or the overachievers in school that the adults liked (This included jocks). The Muppet Show's Sam the Eagle (above) is a perfect example of a square. Other examples, of a more villainous nature, would be John Vernon, who played Dean Wormer in Animal House, Paul Gleason, who played Principal Vernon in Breakfast Club, and J.T. Walsh, who played Sgt. Dickerson in Good Morning, Vietnam and Big Bob in Pleasantville.

Yes, it was a wonderful time in this country. You could make jokes about Lawrence Welk, Pat Boone, Dan Quayle or The Waltons, and people would laugh. Nobody tried to get you fired from your job. We showed nerds to be lovable goofs and it made feel good about ourselves. If the squares made us feel bad about ourselves, thumbed our noses at them and went on having fun. Life was good.

Now, things have sadly changed. Now if you make fun of a square, like Tim Tebow or Sarah Palin, you are considered a "terrorist." Every talk radio show host will start throwing a big fit, Fox News will lead every hour with wall-to-wall coverage and Facebook will suddenly have a bunch of hate sights about you. Yes, making fun or disrespecting "squares" doesn't get laughs now. Instead of laughs, Megan Kelly will scream and whine about this every hour, Eric Bolling will call you bad names and then they will have Bill O'Reilly will finish you off. A bunch of stay-at-home moms (with nothing better to do) will try to have you unfriended and removed from Facebook. You see, "squares" are now our heroes and they are saving America from dangerous threats, like "nerds."

Yes, the big thing among some talk radio show host is to blame "nerds" for our problems. One host claims that "nerds use their brains to hurt us." They are to blame for science, technology, education and liberal journalism. Another host claims that most of the "immoral" entertainment was developed by "nerds" in Hollywood to try to empress women. These guys also claim that "nerds" want to be liked by women, so they let them be in authority and run things. It is all because they "worship" fictional strong women like Wonder Woman, Lara Croft and Xena. When the "nerds" aren't worshiping Wonder Woman, making dirty movies and music, or hurting us with their brains, "nerds" are committing murder, rape, child molestation and other crimes. However, these talk radio guys always point out that the worst thing "nerds" do "is to plot revenge on the popular kids who made fun of them in school." It is hard to believe these talk radio guys make more money than anyone else in the radio industry.

Of course, this makes sense that talk radio people and goons on Fox News take up for "squares" because THEY ARE THE "SQUARES." On the other hand, nerds are another group of "outsiders" that they can tell us to hate and blame all of our problems on.

This part of the problem in radio. Once upon a time, a Top-40 or rock DJ would have poked fun at "squares," but now the "squares" in talk radio work for the same company as that owns the rock/T40 station. The corporate management people are all "squares" too (Have you ever met a business person that WASN'T a "square"?), so they don't allow the rock/T40 people to make fun of "squares." As a matter of fact, the DJs on rock/T40 station sound as "square" as the talk radio "squares." They also don't want to hire a "nerd," because that would contribute to their evil plot to get revenge on the popular kids in school (who were "squares").

That is the opposite of Bill Drake's philosophy that most listeners want to be told what is cool and hip, so they want to be cool and hip. Of course, that was the days when being cool and hip was better than being "square." Now "cool and hip" is an act of terrorism.

I say we should make fun of the "squares," because how else will a "nerd" like myself ever look "cool and hip" to empress women and get revenge on those popular kids who made fun of me in school.

Opinions, like these, are why I'm considered the Super-Villain of the Ozarks!!! Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!    

Saturday, January 7, 2012

DESDINOVA'S TOP TWENTY JAZZ-HORN ROCK SONGS

1. "One Fine Morning" - Lighthouse
2. "Lucretia MacEvil" - Blood, Sweat & Tears
3. "25 Or 6 To 4" - Chicago
4. "Vehicle" - Ides of March
5. "Spinning Wheel" - Blood, Sweat & Tears
6. "Get It On" - Chase
7. "K-Jee" - The Nite-Liters
8. "Saturday In the Park" - Chicago
9. "Groovin Is Easy" - Electric Flag
10. "Beginnings" - Chicago
11. "Morning Will Come" - Spirit
12. "Glad" - Traffic
13. "Make Me Smile" - Chicago
14. "Them Changes" - Buddy Miles Express
15.  "Found a Child" - Ballin Jack (The source of the guitar riff in Young MC's "Bust a Move")
16.  "Drinking Wine" - Electric Flag
17. "Just You and Me" - Chicago
18. "You've Made Me So Very Happy" - Blood, Sweat & Tears
19. "Killing Floor" - Electric Flag
20. "Pretty Lady" - Lighthouse

Friday, January 6, 2012

WHO REALLY KILLED JAZZ-HORN ROCK? NOT PRESIDENT NIXON

This post may shock some of you who read the old blog, but I am going to let a Republican off hook for something he often gets blamed for. First, a little rock and roll history.

In 1967, by a group called the "American Music Band" recorded the music for the Roger Corman/Peter Fonda film The Trip. They soon renamed themselves The Electric Flag, after being signed to Columbia Records. They released their first LP in 1968. This group featured a jazz-influenced horn section.

Also in 1967, Al Kooper of the Blues Project and former Mother of Invention member Jim Fielder decided to create a "rock and roll Big Band" sound based on 40's Big Bands, Maynard Ferguson's band and producer James William Guerico's use of brass backing for the pop group the Buckinghams. They called this group Blood, Sweat & Tears. They also released an LP on Columbia in 1968.

Also, in 1968, producer James Willaim Guerico began working with another Chicago group called The Big Thing. They signed to Columbia and released an LP under the name Chicago Transit Authority in 1969. After that first LP they shortened their name to Chicago.

Soon there was a Canadian jazz-horn rock band on the GRT label named Lighthouse. Over on Capitol Records, a jazz-horn band called Ides of March debuted. Columbia added another jazz-horn band in 1970 with Chase. In 1971, Warner Brothers brought out Tower of Power and RCA gave us the Nite-Lighters. I should also mention two more jazz-piano rock bands, Spirit on Columbia (Surprise!) since 1968, and Steely Dan, who first appeared on ABC in 1972. 

However, by 1973, the jazz-horn bands were not as popular as they had been in their 1969-1970 heyday. Only, Chicago, Tower of Power and Steely Dan managed to stay around to the 80s. Ides of March later dropped the horns and reformed as Survivor. Many rock historians and radio DJs have claimed what hurt the jazz-horn bands was Blood, Sweat & Tears performing at the White House during Richard Nixon's presidency. This supposedly made these groups "uncool." While this sounds good, I think it was two other factors.

Like many fads, jazz-horn rock suffered from overkill. Jazz-horn rock was radio friendly for both the heavy FM album rock stations and AM Top-40. Since it was popular, the record companies wanted to cash in on it. The problem was one record company did the most cashing in: Columbia. As I mentioned Electric Flag, Blood, Sweat & Tears, Chicago, Spirit and Chase were all on Columbia, not to mention about four or five other jazz-horn bands, as well as Ramsey Lewis and Miles Davis, who released critically acclaimed "rock albums." (Let's face it, after Miles Davis did Bitches Brew, there really wasn't any point in some of these bands trying to do jazz rock.) Columbia had put all their eggs in one basket. The story goes that a jazz-horn band called Soft White Underbelly sent a tape to Columbia. When they asked why they hadn't been signed, someone at Columbia said, "We're sick of bands with horns. We're now looking for the next Led Zeppelin, Grand Funk Railroad, Deep Purple or Black Sabbath." The group submitted at new tape with a more heavy metal sound under the name Blue Oyster Cult and the rest is history.


If we want to blame some person, lets blame this kid from Awkward Family Photos and all others like him. Lets face it, we have all heard garage bands do horrible covers of the Beatles, the Stones and the Who songs or country bands, who think they can do songs by CCR, the Eagles, Skynard or the Band. It gets worse when bands try to do Led Zep, Sabbath, Kiss or Van Halen. No band should even consider covers of prog rock bands like Jethro Tull, Yes, or the Moody Blues.

However, just about any good junior high/high school/college pep or marching band can do great version or "Spinning Wheel," "25 or 6 to 4," or "One Fine Morning." I recently heard a MSU Bears Basketball road game on KTXR and while Art Hains was recapping the first half of the game, the home team's pep band was playing Chase's "Get It On" behind him. The school band doing a killer version of your song, hurts your rock and roll street cred more than playing for Tricia Nixon and Tricky Dicky.

The late 70s saw a short boom in jazz fusion groups like Weather Report, Spyro Gyra, Return To Forever and Pat Metheny Group. The closest thing to the jazz-horn bands of the late 60s/early 70s in recent years would be the Dave Mathews Band, which was popular in the 90s with radio programmers. However, many of the big hits of the jazz-horn boom are still heard on radio and still downloaded to MP3 players.

I'll provide you with a list of my favorite jazz-horn hits. Meanwhile, check out this website, Horn Rock Heaven.
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