Showing posts with label Old Blog. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Old Blog. Show all posts

Sunday, December 4, 2016

WHAT DID MATTEL'S SOMERSAULTY THE CLOWN DOLL SAY?



This is a Mattel Somersaulty the Clown pull string doll. I had one just like this when I was a child. I had a hard time understanding what he said. He was supposed to say, "Do you want to see me do a somersault?" However, it always sounded more like "Do you want to see me suck soapy water?" True story.

NOTE: I had used this anecdote as part of a post on the original blog. I decided to delete that post, but this anecdote made me laugh so hard, I decided to use it in a post here since it had to do with a retro toy of the 70s. Hope you enjoy it.
 

Sunday, January 18, 2015

I COULD HAVE BEEN CHARLIE


The horrible events in Paris last week and the upcoming eighth anniversary of the original Desdinova the Super Villain of the Ozarks blog, made me ponder a serious question: Could an attack like the one at Charlie Hebdo happen here in the United States of America? Yes, as a matter of fact, it could have happened to me several times.

The original blog was a satirical jabs at what was going on in the news, with a few real news pieces hear and there. Much of the content was poking fun at the talk radio industry and a very popular talk radio show host here in Springfield, Missouri. At that time, poking fun at this guy was the equivalent of poking fun of the prophet Mohammed. His listeners were radical fanatics. Before I started the blog, I enraged his fans when the Springfield News Leader ran a article about his marathon broadcast during the ice storm with a photo of him, his wife and his dog. I posted a comment over on Ron Davis' Chatter blog about the photo, something like "Which one is his wife and which one is his dog?" I was the most hated man in Springfield, Missouri, because he supposedly cried about it on-air during his show. Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Let me explain that the persona of Desdinova started because this talk radio show host would go on attack people on Chatter and the Missouri Radio Message Board. He would say crude and disrespectful things about TV news personalities and other radio stations. Needless to say, I never felt one bit of remorse poking fun at this guy and trying to knock him off of the pedestal he had place himself upon.   

Let me say this from experience, talk radio personalities are some of the scummiest people in the world. They are heartless, mean-spirited jerks. Like the playground bully, they will call you names, insult you, and want to fight you, but when you retaliate and get the best of them, they cry and whine like a infant with a wet diaper. They then start their, "They are out to get me" routine. This causes their nitwit fans to feel sorry for them and rally to show their support. This guy was a master at that game. He had his audience believing that not only was I a threat to his well-being, but his life was threatened by "devil worshipers" and "anti-war activist."

From the moment I began the blog, the fans of this talk show host were leaving hateful and threatening messages on the blog. Several called for my death. There were also several blogs that sprang up to champion this talk radio show host and slam me. These bloggers were claiming I was "unethical" and "cowardly" because I didn't have "my real name" or "home address" on my blog. Really? Put my name and home address on my blog, so every hot-headed psychopath in Springfield and the world could see it? I wasn't stupid. I was a student at SMSU during the Normal Heart uproar when students had their tires slashed on their cars and one student had his home burned to the ground. Springfield gets violent with people who have a different opinion than theirs, especially when there is a charismatic figure agitating them.

I should also bring up here that those nasty comments by this guy left on Chatter and Missouri Radio Message Board were usually under the name "The Talk Radio Guy." So, he used an alias too, but because I was making him look like the fool that he really was, he and his sycophantic followers portrayed me out to be the bad guy (or super-villain). He was trashing local media right and left once on one of these sight, when I asked him (not knowing who he was) "What do you like - that new guy on K*** named John Jacob Jinglehimerschmit?"  At the time I didn't know his name, only that he used his first and middle names. The news director at the radio station I worked at recognized this guy as a someone, who had been fired from a radio station in Jefferson City, where he had previously worked. There this radio host used his real name and, oddly enough, his real name sounded like Jinglehimerschmitt. This "Talk Radio Guy" informed me of the name of the host at our competing radio station and then said that "I should have more respect for a talented broadcaster and true conservative." Note this was after he had slammed some of my co-workers and several TV news people.

So I found a way to needle him, that used to cause him to lash out at me on these message boards. I would refer to him using his current on-air name, but between the middle and last name I would add 'John Jacob Jinglehimerschmitt' and several great vocalise song titles from the 50s and 60s, such as "Doo Wah Diddy Diddy Do," "Rama Lama Ding Dong," "Papa Ooo-Mow-Mow" and others. I even added the 70s McDonald's Big Mac jingle to his name. He and his followers didn't like it, but everyone else thought it was funny.

Most of what I said was so harmless, so goofy and so outrageous, that I still can't believe anyone was upset about it. One thing that upset this talk radio host and his fans was jokes I made about "when I marry Paris Hilton." This guy had a deep and disturbing hatred for celebrities (which bothered me because I consider myself one), especially female celebrities...and especially Paris Hilton. I have been told by one person, who worked at that radio station, that this host would get violently angry when he read my blog. They knew I had mentioned Paris Hilton, because he would have a major meltdown in his office. He once screamed "HOW CAN HE SAY PARIS HILTON IS BETTER LOOKING THAN SARAH PALIN?," then he threw or kicked his waste basket across the room. To me, that sounds like someone with serious mental issues.

Most of the time what made this guy and his fans upset was basically that I made a snarky post that was the opposite of what he had said on his show that morning. Honestly, that was all I had to do to make people mad. If he said something like, "I think we should publicly execute anyone who drinks Diet Pepsi," I would say something on my blog like "When I the take over the world, I will force everyone to drink Diet Pepsi. If they resist, they WILL DIE! Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" They next day, he would be on his radio show complaining that an anonymous blogger was a "threat to the him" and "the community at large" because of my "anti-American opinions" (a nervy accusation to make about me since he was a Canadian - BTW I have nothing against Canadians). All I did was reverse the crazy things he said.

As I mentioned before, the whole Desdinova persona was a combination of several pop culture villains. I thought everyone spent Saturday morning watching cartoon where a villain bragged about what he would do when he "ruled the world." Once I said in a post that "everyone will bow to me, Desdinova the Super-Villain of the Ozarks!!! Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" One of this guys little minions posted on my blog, "I will not bow to you. I will only serve the Lord Jesus Christ." That made me fell like dirt. Also the fact this person didn't want me to rule the world hurt my self-esteem. 

I was not a listener to his show, but I knew what he did, because he would post clips from his show on his radio station's website. Also our boss forced our news director to tape his show and give a report on what topics were discussed on that his show. I recently found a file of these reports at work and found that our news director noted "He had a rant about the 'masked anonymous blogger' ridiculing him."

You would think people in the media industry would find this funny, since this guy like to attack them. The News Leader editorial board was against "anonymous bloggers" and one columnist especially didn't like me because they were a big fan of this talk radio show host (also I had made light of one of her columns about how she didn't like a local urban legend being turned into a horror film). Also a family member, who worked at the time for another radio station cluster in town, mentioned me for an open position and was told I was banned from working there, because they thought my satirical website poking fun of a rival radio station's personality was "unethical" and "unprofessional."

Even people I worked with didn't support me. Two salesmen at the radio station cluster I worked for had a big man crush on this host and his radio station. They kept telling me that I had "no right to make fun of him" and they were going to reveal my identity to him. With co-workers like that, who needs enemies.

I will say that I had more supporters among the local TV news people and some of the people who had to work at the radio station with this talk radio host. I've heard some scary story about this guy threatening people and trying to fight people. He almost punched a legendary broadcaster in this community, when he visited the radio station, because he thought this man was Desdinova (which was the subject of the cartoon above).  Also heard a funny story about how this guy sent around a memo at the radio station saying he didn't want "homosexuals using the same bathroom as him" after finding a pink toothbrush in the men's room.

This guy may have jumped the shark when he claimed the mayor and other Springfield official were covering up the fact that a gang of devil worshipers were living in tunnels under Park Central Square in Springfield. That was what was so great about the old blog, because as David Letterman would say, "The comedy just writes itself." I immediately began posting about "my secret laboratory and hideout below the city at 666 Park Central Square."

Do I still receive death threats today? No. I've not received a threatening message in several years. One reason is, of course, I started a new blog that focused on retro pop culture and abstained from too much satire of current events. Also, that talk radio show host is no longer on the air. When he was fired from the radio station he worked for, I was like David Frye when President Nixon resigned and LBJ died or Yakoff Schmirnoff when the Iron Curtain fell.

The bloggers that were against me all disappeared around the same time. I guess without a hero to stand up for, they decided there was no point in going on. They may have moved to Facebook, but  who would want to "friend" them. One blogger made one post about me and that was it. He was especially upset that I said I wanted to ban country music. I only found the blog after I Googled the name of the blog. One blogger once posted a picture of Stalin on his website and linked it to my blog.
 
I should also point out that some of the worst death threats I got had nothing to do with this talk radio show host. It was about the case in St. Louis where a mother created a My Space site to attack her daughter's classmate, causing the girl to commit suicide. After that I stopped allowing comments on my blog. After that, a talk radio show host who worked for my company wanted me to reopen the comments so he could "debate me on the issues." I said to him, "Why do you want to debate the opinions of a guy, who wears a mask and claims to live under the city square with an army of robots and a death ray?" I honestly don't think he understood how stupid he and those others looked taking me so serious. 

Through all of this craziness, I never did fear for my life, because very few people knew who Desdinova really was. A former classmate from Lebanon tried to out me on another website, but I had that removed (kind of nervy for a guy named Bubba).

My enemies might claim to be "Standing Up For What Is Right," but as the killers of the Charlie Hebdo staff found out, killing is always against the law. It is even wrong to kill the Super-Villain of the Ozarks!!!Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!     


       


Wednesday, September 3, 2014

A NEW POST ON THE OLD BLOG

Who is this guy? Check out the new post on the old blog site and find out. See what the guy above has to do with this guy from Animal House.


Thursday, January 16, 2014

DESDINOVA'S BIG MOVE

For those of you wondering about the lack of post on this blog, I will give you (grainy smart phone) photographic proof of my activities. I moved to a different apartment. Some of you may remember that on the old blog I sometimes gave my address as 666 Park Central Square in Springfield, Missouri. That was a joke aimed at a local talk radio host and part of a persona I created as a evil super-villain/mad scientist bent on taking over the country.

Truth is I had lived in a third floor apartment since 2002. Sadly, my health has declined to a point I cannot climb three flights of stairs like I once did. Part of that was due to a fall on ice on the sidewalk at my apartment complex four years ago. I fell again before Christmas. Maybe fearing a lawsuit, they decided I could move to a ground floor apartment. Now comes the job of unpacking everything. Here is what I have ahead of me.
Notice the Phantom of the Opera still I posted Halloween

A reprint of a poster for the Superman serial

Velvet Underground's Loaded has been my moving soundtrack


CDs, their shelves and some Christmas candy

While I'm at it, I want to give a shout out to My Movers Moving and Storage and the U.S. Post Office.

My Movers moved my huge collection of CD, DVDs, VHS tapes and books along with my furniture with out any trouble. The movers dismantled my futon to remove it from my old apartment and took the time to reassembled it in the new apartment. I won't go into details but they are very honest in their pricing.

Do not let certain people out there tell you that the United States Post Office is inefficient and useless. I filled out a change of address on December 31 and they had already starting forwarding my mail to my new apartment on January 2nd. Remember how UPS and Fed-Ex screwed up during Christmas?

  

Sunday, August 25, 2013

BEST OF DESDINOVA: THE DARK KNIGHT WILL SUCK COLLECTION

The whole furrier over Ben Affleck being selected to play Batman in an upcoming movie reminds me of  a tiny blog post I made on the old blog that attracted some hatred on a minor national scale, rather than local Springfield/Ozarks hatred that I usually faced at that time.


I saw on another website some photos "preview" photos of the late Heath Ledger's makeup for the up coming Batman film The Dark Knight. It wasn't like the hardened grin of Jack Nicholson or even the clown face over a mustache like Cesar Romero, it was just gobbed and smeared on his face like a child playing the Joker to his next door neighbors Batman in the backyard.

The post was simple. You can read it here: I THINK THE DARK KNIGHT WILL SUCK. In this post I said two things that upset extreme Batman fanatics.
  1. I didn't like Frank Miller's Dark Knight comic books.
  2. I like the 1966 TV show Batman and the full length movie that featured the cast.


During that time, I was always surprised when I got a response outside of Springfield, Missouri. A comment was posted by a person who called himself "andrew." Not sure who he was but he claimed to be an assistant on The Dark Knight set (Yeah right!). He was not very happy with me. So, of course, I had to make fun of this guy on the blog. Here is the post: I UPSET A COMIC BOOK GEEK AND I STILL THINK THE DARK KNIGHT WILL SUCK.

I should point out that I had to stop allowing comments on the old blog in 2009, due to spam by get-rich-quick websites and some Libertarian guy who was planing to run for president in 2012. When I stopped the comments, the previous comments were no longer shown on the blog. Not sure why, but I still have access them through the Blogger dashboard. Here is the complete text of "andrew's" rant.

"Um i might be late on this comment but i came across your site and read what you have to say about the dark knight. First of all you may be suffering from being a douche bag. 2nd read a book and read history on wha batman is really suppose to be because nolan has figured it out. Burtons batmans were great then ruined by the next two obviously. The darkness is finally back with batman begins and the dark knight. i work for warner bro's as a PA, and ledgers makeup is supreme to what it is suppose to be. He is scarred in actuality, and the makeup just adds to the image because he obviously puts it on himself, he does not care what it looks like. Get your head out of your ass and go make some more web sites that just makes you sound ignorant and un educated. Yes i do study film, and you may not nonethelss, go watch the trailer again because you really need to if you took the time to make this website, and by the way did you try and justify the 60's batman show somehow?"

The first thing I noticed, that I mentioned in my blog response, is "andrew" apparently didn't know how to use capital letters.

With in a short time, the original blog post made the rounds of the fanatical Batman fans on the web. It was at one point the most read post on my blog. I even had my own thread on IMDB (That was removed for some reason). So, I decided to to be fair and go see The Dark Knight.

You must know something about me, I don't think I have ever hated a movie I saw at a movie theater. Only about two or three, but I just think that going to a movie theater is a special occasion.

Now for the irony of the original post; I saw The Dark Knight TWICE! The first time was at a Springfield movie theater. After that, I wrote this post: I DIDN'T LIKE THE DARK KNIGHT (but it didn't suck as bad as I thought it would). After that, I went to a drive-in at Aurora, Missouri, with some family members. I hadn't been to a drive-in since I was small, so I thought it would be great to go with them. The movies on the double feature was Babylon A.D. and (You guest it) The Dark Knight. Remember what I said earlier about not hating a movie I saw at a theater, well, Babylon A.D, was the only one I hated. It was confusing and Vin Diesel can't act. After sitting through Babylon A.D, I began to realize I HATED THE DARK KNIGHT! It was just a obnoxious and overblown action film with people dressed as characters from the Batman comic book.

At least two people posted comments agreed with me. A person named Eduardo posted this comment:
"You are entitled to like the old Batman. Although this is a new Batman supposed to be taken from the "The Dark Knight Returns" comic book series which relaunched the character in the 80's. What I think is lacking from the Christopher Nolan films is the atmosphere which was achieved by Tim Burton's first two Batman Films from 1989 and 1990. For me, personally, those were the best achievements of Batman on film, period. They struck a balance between looking like comic books, but looking serious nonetheless. The new film looks more like a Michael Mann film (ie. Heat) for the exterior scenes, there is not enough atmosphere. Gotham, usually a character by itself in all of the previous films, takes a back seat on this one. However, what I believe is that each generation gets their own "revamped" version of Comic Book or literary classics. For those who grew up in the 60's, the TV Batman by Adam West is the ultimate "archetype" of the character, for the children of the 80's its either the Dark Knight or Michael Keaton."
My favorite was from a person named Mike:
I agree that this movie looks terrible mostly because of the Joker's makeup. The joker is too vein to leave his house looking like a piece of street trash. Nice concept but you guys ruined the look of the character which is basically the most important part. Batman's outfit looks terrible and the joker looks terrible. It would be easy for anyone to play the Joker, he's an iconic character. Hopefully next time he hits the big screen they don't make him look homeless.
After that I found that there a have been several websites pop-up that not only point out what is wrong with The Dark Knight, but are called "The Dark Knight Sucks" or something to that extent. My favorite is a post on The Rawness blog.

The thing about the old blog is when I made many of the post, I was demonized as a horrible person who should be executed as an "enemy combatant" (Another Ozarks blogger actually called me that). Since that time, I've found that many of the positions I held were the right ones and the people and things I poked fun at deserved to be made fun of. Case in point: Many of the local talk radio people in town that I poked fun of was championing a former SMSU/MSU student who was suing the school because she claimed the students harassed her and the teachers failed her for not compromising her religious beliefs. One of our local talk radio show host (Thank God, he is no longer on the air) suggested that the buildings on campus be set on fire and the students and faculty be shot as they exited the buildings. A friend of mine on Facebook was a student in that department at the time. She and several other classmates had a discussion going on Facebook about this plaintiff and the lawsuit this week. Apparently, this person didn't work will with the other students...when she came to class. Also several mentioned she didn't have to be "the topic group" she said "harassed" her. As one person said, "The media never asked us about what happened or what she was like to work with."

But then again the people who hated the old blog are the ones who put up websites or adorn there Facebook sites with pictures of the President Photoshoped with the bad makeup job Heath Ledger wore in The Dark Knight.

My opinions are why I'm considered the Super Villain of the Ozarks!!! Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!     
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