Saturday, June 13, 2020
Friday, April 24, 2020
Saturday, January 11, 2020
I will soon be celebrating 13 years as a blogger. A few years ago, I joined Tumblr and began making sarcastic captions to photos. About a year ago, Tumblr installed some sort of robo net nanny, algorithm thing to flag "offensive" & "inappropriate" post. It flagged some really innocent stuff on everyone's Tumblrs. Many good Tumblr bloggers quit, partly because there was nothing done to combat rampant alt right activity (racism, antisemitism, homophobia), but a girl in shorts or, in my case, a photo of a person's finger in the center of a bagel (the algorithm thought it was a "close up of sexual intercourse") could get you "flagged" as "inappropriate."
Needless to say, Tumblr decided to punish me & branded me "NSFW". When you are branded "NSFW" on Tumblr, the confesscate you avatar-profile pic, replacing it with some little, silly, orange shape. I sometime post my famous avatar-profile pic in my Tumblr feed just to remind folks of what Desdinova the Super Villain of the Ozarks looks like. Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
Also the algorithm didn't stop the number of "porn bots" that follow you. It is hard to determine who is a real follower and who is a porn bot for a dating or sex site.
That being said, I was followed recently by a pop culture Tumblr called Camp Kitchy Kitchy Koo, which post some very creative GIF files. They must like my Tumblr, because they made a psychedelic GIF of my famous avatar-profile picture. I posted it above. Thank you, Camp Kitchy Kitchy Koo! This had been a rough week, with three illnesses, expensive car trouble, & extra bills, but you made me smile!
Thursday, January 2, 2020
Many people make New Year's Resolutions. I usually don't, because I know I won't keep them. However, I'm going to make a few to see if I can keep them.
1. People complain that I drink too much soda. I usually drink about ten to fifteen 16 oz. bottles of Diet Pepsi a day. I feel I can do better than that. I'm going to bump it up to five to ten 2 littler bottles a day.
2. Consider using a new conversation starter when I meet women. Something like, "Nice weather we are having" rather than "Could you bend over so I can smell your butt?" That line isn't working.
3. Renew my membership in the Illuminati.
4. Dedicate more of my time and my talent to helping the Deep State take over America.
5. Make more memes using that crying woman/cat with the plate of broccoli template.
6. Report recipes for Asian cuisine that feature the words "better than take-out" or ramen recipes that say "throw out the seasoning packet" to the Pinterest administrators as being "racist."
7. Teach my 3 year old nephew how to "cuss like a sailor."
8. Meet a woman who just wants me for my body.
9. Buy more crap at estate sales.
10. Eat more fast food.
11. Finish, at least, one of my novels. Until then I will keep posting excerpts on Facebook to annoy former co-workers, who said they didn't want to read it.
Most of all, I hope you and your love ones have a wonderful and safe 2020.
Sunday, December 22, 2019
Mariah Carey's seasonal favorite, "All I Want For Christmas", final hit Number One on the Billboard charts. It is the longest a song has taken to hit Number One in Billboard history. It was first released on her 1994 Christmas CD. Why it has now made it to Number One came about because of several factors. It is played heavily by radio stations when they go to "all Christmas" this time of year. When it was released in the mid-90s, Christmas music was considered "un-cool" by radio. That changed about 2001 or so. Another factor that lead to the song hitting Number One is the tracking of downloads and song streaming. Last year at this time, Dean Martin version of "Baby It's Cold Outside" was Number One on downloads.
However, there is a group of old, white men on social media, who believe Mariah's Phil Spector-ish Christmas tune hitting Number One is a sign of the end of the world. This group of racist, woman haters are up in arms about this landmark moment in pop music history. They are constantly attacking the song as being "awful" and "unlistenable." They then make the claim that the reason it became a hit is because "most current music is awful." OK Boomers, whatever.
These same men (Yes, it is ALL men complaining about this - when they are not complaining about Greta Thunberg being Time's Person of the Year) were cheering last year when Dean Martin was Number One on the downloads chart with "Baby It's Cold Outside." Why can't they be happy about this too? They also are attacking Ariana Grande over using the tune of "My Favorite Things" for her recent hit.
Why don't they direct their hatred toward the people responsible for that "Christmas Shoes" song? They deserve to be waterboarded.
Of course, opinions, like this one, is why I'm considered the Super-Villain of the Ozarks!!! Mwu-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!