Tuesday, July 19, 2011


I hate when some doofus jumps my songs on the juke box at Buffalo Wild Wings. I especially hate when they jump my great classic rock/punk/funk picks for current country. The current state of country music is so bad. Most of the songs have a cut and paste quality to them.

What am I talking about? Most current country songs follow a pattern in the lyrics. When I worked in country music radio in the 90s, the songs each sounded different. The current country song crop all have lyrics that sound alike.

I have come up with a cut and paste method for writing a current country song.

First, you start off saying that you grew up on a dirt road.
Second, you mention your grandparents.
Third, mention going to church.
Forth, talk about drinking beer.
Fifth, mention listening to Hank Jr., Johnny Cash, Jimmy Buffett or Lynard Skynard or all of them.
Sixth, mention the mail box at the end of the dirt road you grew up on.
Seventh, mention blue jeans or cutoff jeans being worn by a girl.
Eighth, slam New York or Hollywood or both.
Ninth, compare your love for a woman to Johnny Cash and June Carter.
Tenth, mention that you salute the veterans and troop serving in the military.
Eleventh, mention drinking beer again.
Twelfth, mention listening to Hank Jr., Johnny Cash, Jimmy Buffett, or Lynard Skynard or all of them.
Thirteenth, mention driving your pickup down a dirt road.
Fourteenth, mention drinking beer again.
Fifteenth, mention going to church again.
Sixteenth, mention listening to Hank Jr, Johnny Cash, Jimmy Buffett, or Lynard Skynard or all of them again.
Seventh, mention the troops and church or both again.

There you go. You now have a current hit country song.

No comments:

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...